Brady Bunch Lesbians!

Oh my Got! Maureen McCormick, who vas Marcia on da Brady Bunch has leaked to the press dat she had a lesbian affair vith JAN BRADY ven dey vere doing da show. Oh my Got! Is dat vild? Check out my latest video on ProfessorAlbert.com and on You Tube!


Could you imagine if da Skipper from Gilligan's Island came out and said dat he was doing da vild ting vith Gilligan!

Oh my Got! Dis Brady ting is similiar. Da TV vurld vill never be da same!

My Two New Dance Videos following the success of U R A CELEBRITY!

Hello FANS!

Oh MY GOT! Check out my two new DANCE VIDEOS! "Don't GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!" and "LIFE ROCKS!" on my vebsite at ProfessorAlbert.com (da other page you were on Dummy.) I vill have a high DEF Version up of "LIFE ROCKS" soon so you can check out all of da amazing special effects. Oh please know dat da two other Professor Alberts in the video are not my brothers. I am an only child. Ve did dat vith da digital magic. Isn't it fun to see three of such a sexy guy like me?

I have got da most craziest publicity on my new Album. Tank you for your support. IT VILL BE OUT IN SEPTEMBER!

Got to run, uh I mean Dance!

I vill have my September club dates posted soon.

Love you my FANS!

Professor Albert (who is REALLY IN DA HOUSE NOW!)

My NEW DANCE SINGLE! Don't miss it!

Hello dere, my fans. My new dance single "U R A CELEBRITY!" is out. Check out da video on YouTube or my vebsite.

Please go and buy it for I need da money. I can't sell theories anymore. Dey have become a dime a dozen in dis information age. So please go and buy my single.

Da Album "Professor Albert: You R A Celebrity" should be out in September.

Thank you for your continued support and keep smiling!

Love to you all,

Professor Albert

Stupid is da new Sexy! OY!

Vell, it is true. Stupid is da new Sexy. Every sexy celebrity today is STUPID, or at least da young new ones. Yes, I know dat ve like da stupid vomen but sometimes it is nice to talk to a celebrity after you have dem in da sack. Sometimes you don't vant to talk about jail time, or hating your mother or your father, or rehab or how you have gotten so fat and turned into vite trash!

Vere are da young sexy celebrities vith brains? Vuns dat vill know how to tickle your fancy in vays dat are new and fun?

Please let me know if you find any sexy smart ladies and send dem my phone number. 1 - 800 - Professor-Albert.

OY!

Vere are da truly sexy celebrities?

Vere are da truly sexy celebrities? Right now, ve only have da little stupid girls who are filling up da tabloids vith all of dere stupid exploits and tings. But vere are da vomen, not da little girls. Da vomen who are truly sexy? Back in my youth, ven I was doing all my experiments and tings, I vould take a break from breaking da atom and go to da movies and see sexy stars like Lana Turner, or Rachel Welch, or Sophia Loren. Dese were vomen! Dese vere sexy! Dese vere icons of sexuality and beauty!

Now ve have drunken, stupid girls who get DUI, flip out at photo shoots and go to jail. Vere are the truly beautiful women today?

Please help me out and write back with your comments on who today is truly sexy!

Thank you again for reading and vatching my videos! Go have da good sex!

Vat is Wrong vith Celebrity Today?

Oh my Gott! Vat da hell is wrong vith Celebrities today?

Everyvun is scared of scandal. Everyvun has to be politically correct.
So vat if you are caught drunk vith cocaine up your nose vile making love to your boyfriend's father! Don't apologize! Don't!
Vat da hell are you doing? Simply say "Hey I vas partying and I vanted to try someting new!" Who cares about da Media! Who cares about vat people think? Celebrities do not apologize for doing da things dat we want you to do! Ve love it ven you are screwed up. Ve love it ven you do stupid things! Why do you think ve love Paris Hilton so much!